Tuesday, April 08, 2008


Do remember those 80s bumper stickers that said something like "mean people suck"? (By the way, they must still make them, because I found a picture of one!) Anyway, I've decided negative people aren't all that much better.

Yesterday a friend (and, yes, I do consider this woman a friend) was quick to point out that if the kid had been in this same accident in another state, she wouldn't be allowed to drive again until the age of 18. That could be true, but even the police officer who wrote the kid the ticket for failure to yield seemed upset over it. In fact, I remember him apologizing to me for writing the ticket. Yes, the accident wouldn't have happened if the kid hadn't been in the other lane. Yes, the roads were icy and wet. The kid said she slid. The cop says she was going less than 10mph. No, the kid doesn't have years or driving experience.

Now, this isn't the first time my friend has taken any piece of news and opted to put a "spin" on it. A few years ago when the kid got her braces removed, the same friend's reply to that "multi-thousand dollar smile" was something like "well, I hope they'll still be straight a year from now."

So what should I do? This friend and I are involved in a few groups and organizations together, and she's very knowledgeable about those and willing to help if she's needed, so totally ignoring her isn't an option. Besides, like I said, I do consider her my friend. And, truth be told, I don't make friends easily, which means I don't have a whole lot of them gathering around, collecting dust *grin*. And ones who are near my geographically are even more rare.

I am trying to clear my life of negativity, though. (Well, that and stress.) We've told our daughter that you are who you hang out with. I don't want to be a negative person. I really don't! I'm naturally a bit of a pessimist, I know this about myself. (I prefer to look at it as being "extra prepared for the challenges that may arise.") I really don't need someone else reminding me of the what ifs. Yet, I've noticed that I become more so after conversations with this friend. That isn't who I want to be!!!

Has anyone else ever faced this or am I alone in my struggle? Can anyone offer advice?

1 comment:

Stephanie said...

Wow - this one is a hard one. I've got that same situation... only it's with my mother! :snort: I think that perhaps if you can find a way to be a light to her. Maybe by your positive attitude she'll come around. You can put the positive spin on it. :)

Updates on the kid?